Dear Ottawa Senators primary, secondary, and tertiary scorers,
Listen, I'm sure you guys already know all this. Really. It's just... the way things have been going, it seems like you need a reminder. So here it is. Put the puck in the net. The more goals you score, the less each goal our netminder lets in matters. Seriously. Let's just do what we can, alright? And then a little bit more than that.
Oh, and just a clarification: The net in the above image is the opposition's net. Don't put it in our own net. Thanks a bunch.
Sincerely,
Peter
P.S. Oh yeah, and quatertiary scoring: keep up the good work!
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